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Parkinsons claiming the whole family

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Leeds Kat
Parkinsons claiming the whole family

Hi all

This is my first time posting on here so apologies if I start to ramble....

My dad was diagnosed with PD about 7 years ago and since then has had 3 serious falls resulting in major surgery and long hospital stays. When he is having a good day (or at least a good hour) he can walk using a frame or a walker however increasingly he is struggling to walk at all as his legs 'collapse'. He has also now started with urinary incontinence at least once if not twice a night.

While the PD is awful and its heartbreaking to have to watch/care for my dad I am also extremely concerned for my mum who simply cannot cope. She has never come to terms with the PD diagnosis, the lifestyle changes it has involves, the loss of the future she and my dad were planning or indeed the loss of the person my dad once was. She is up every night wish my dad and she is physically and emotionally exhausted and depressed. She will not go to the doctors as she says she cant face having to speak about it and she refuses to seek any kind of social care as she cant face having strangers in the house.

Neither of my parents will take advantage of the support that is available and I feel like I am watching them both fade away in front of me. I am sure that life as a family with PD doesn't have to be a miserable as this but I don't know where to turn. I cant walk away from my family but I don't want to sink with them. 

if anyone has been in a similar situation or has any advice I would be very grateful.

DivineR

Hi Leeds Kat, 

I feel for you as I can somewhat understand your situation. My parents are in their 80s and when my dad took ill and due to very strong meds got Parkinson symptoms, my mum took it hard. It's taken a good while for them to reach a calm and content lifestyle. As a family we had to really emphasise to my mum that this was just a new phase in her life. Placing carers, cleaners etc in the home. Also my mum went on anti depressants which helped. I'm afraid you may have to explain to your mother how all this is affecting you. Maybe that may make her want to change. It's a hard one but with PD myself I wouldnt like my kids to worry about me in the future.