I’d like to reintroduce myself as I have not contributed to the Forum for a year.
I’m not far off my 79th birthday. I had this guy called Parkinson call six years ago. He's well known as a persistent entity and in spite of several massive brawls, he wouldn’t go away. So I let him in, then plotted devious ways of getting rid of him and kick the bastard out. He invariably returned.
So I sought assistance and with the advice of a local Neurologist, who knew the guy well, I started secretly giving him 62.5 mg of Madopar twice daily. At first it bashed him a bit but gradually, as predicted, this Parkinson chap became more persistent. We then fought back with higher doses as his attacks became more sustained.
I called in more troops who recommended various chemical weapons called agonists which I administered as prescribed. Some of them seemed to hold him back briefly but didn’t stop his invasion. In fact in most cases they either boosted the sod’s armoury or even worse joined forces with him to give me other problems.
I’m now poisoning him with 187.5 mg of Madopar five times a day plus 250 mg of Madopar CR at night. Six months ago I brought in additional advisers, who know Parkinson well, One new weapon they have recommended is called Safinamide. It’s expensive and has not really proved effective but I’m (as my new War Minister suggests) persisting with it for a while, but here on the front line it’s not really stopping the swine. In fact like the agonists the enemy might be using the drug to fight back by bashing me with headaches, eye ache and some increase of distonia.
Parkinson won’t stop the attack or his devious, below the belt methods of fighting. Mentally I am superior to him but he knows all the tricks of warfare and bombards me with massive switch-offs that often immobilise me, severe, bursts of painful distonia, severe sluggishness (bradykinesia) and akinesia, which makes me shuffle forward on my toes
He has even resorted to new warfare (strictly against the Geneva convention) by inflicting niggles such as making my legs burn, filling my mouth with saliva so I dribble, forcing me to the toilet more often and making my tongue stick out
There is no way I am going to give in and he realises that, but his merciless pursuit is gradually wearing me down. I refuse however to let the enemy take away my mental capacity or my cognitive skills and so far he has failed miserably in this quest.
I hope this field report is useful and informative to all my fellow front line fighters?
Excuse the mild expletives but they help emphasise the anger I sometimes feel about him.