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The Destruction

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The Destruction

Hello to  all,

                   I am  thinking how  I can explain my  disapearance , and silence,  ok  I know  its not  required but  I  need  to  tell  the tale as   its  not  nice as I changed my personality  so  much, and  worse  I look  back and survey the  awful wreckage and  destruction  caused  by  my  behaviour and feel  so  ashamed especially as  my dear wife was  hurt deeply  by  my selfishness,  I should  mention  that  I  have had   terrible  shutdowns and Dyskinesia  with alarming Prostate symptoms over  the last year but  the  hammer  blow  was  the death  of  my dear  Mother age  96 and though I thought I had  bottled the  depression  aspect  of   parky  well when my Mam left us a  new  war  fired  up  and  it  was  hell '

           My sad tale  has been  building  for  about  3 years with  rampant  obsessive  behaviour which  wasthe  need to   buy


Sorry for the  break  I was needed elseware ,  but  this info  will be over in   a  few minutes as part  of  my  managing the OCB is  rationing laptop  time,  more  on  this later, as I said  the  need to  purchase items mainly die cast 1/50  scale  model heavy plant  trucks   of  which im  talking  hundreds  ,  then I developed what can  only  be  described  as  OCB   resulting  in  me  purchasing  some  fantastic looking  alloys  and  low profile  boots for  our Toyota  Yaris  ,  bear in  mind the car  already had  alloys and  only  weeks  before I had  fitted new  tyres  to  them this did  not  go  well  with  beloved  and a  major  flare  up  ensued  but  it  made   no  difference   and  I  still  have  almost  a  fetish  with  alloys  and  tyres,  but  the  most  hellish  evil  entity developing  in  my  head  was  the  return  of  the hyper sexuality,  dangerous  hyper sexuality, I  will  continue this  thread  later  as my alloted time  is  up  so  for  now  I  must  go   but  I will  continue  tommorow

                                        BFN          FEDEXLIKE  OR  FEDif  you  like


Dearest Fed

Can I ask if you take a Dopamine Agonist?

If so, PLEASE ask for help.

This obsessive, destructive behaviour can be stopped if you change meds to Levadopa.

It is not easy and needs a lot of support but your life can be changed.

if you are not on DAs...still get help.

You do not have to have your life ruined like this.



Cheshire Cat

Hi Fed

   Welcome back mate you've been missed.

   Live well. Cc


I was just  about  to  post  a  long  description  of  my  illness  when  it  vapourised  so  no  change  then,,,,  I will  attemt  to wrie  this  again  but  not  toniht  sorry  guys




Hi fed not nice that ocb.gambling sex .drinking can rip you and family apart i had £41,000 bankruptcy think i was on premiprezole.


coolWoweeeeee......good to see you back on the forum young Fed ....I haven't been on for a while but thought i would have a butchers tonight and see whats what....and there you were. I realised a while back that you were very low matey but i am so sorry that things became so much worse for you. Also i know how close you were to your lovely Mum and i am so sorry for your loss, she was such a character and you have such a lot of fantastic memories of her. 

I won't bore you with my escapades at the mo !! but when you feel like a catch up....or a rant have a lot of pals on here including me who are good go for it my mate

Meanwhile keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep Rockin and Rollin.

Dolly x


coolHello Doll

                Your  imitablebledelke  style  immediately  takes  the eye  Dear  Dolly  and  how pleased  I am  to  be  contacting  you  again,,  more  to  come  hope  all  family are  well  can  you  resend   your  email  to  me  as   my  laptop  expired  and  this  one  is  my dear  wifes   im  in  my  message  place

                                                        Kindest Regards   Fed

Q   Wont u come out  to  playaaaaaaaay

Q  Made  my  way  upstairs and  had  a  smoke,,  dont  worry  im  not  jumping subjects these  are  only  a  small  2  questions  for DOLLY  (AND  anyoneelse)   of  course  these words from  beatle  music

                                             BFN   FED



My condolences too Fed on the passing away of your mum. Hope time will heal how you feel today and through the weeks. It's a hard thing to accept, and makes matters worse with your PD, but I wish you well


Hi Dolly nice to have you back, hope lifes treating you and your OH well, take care

Regards to you both - Sheila x


smileHello Sheila and  thank  you  for  your  kind  welcome, I  have  posted elsewhere   re  my  Mums  passing  it  seems  to  have  made  me   stronger,, she  was a very tough strong  willed  Lady its almost as if her attitude to life has  passed to  me,  her  youngest child

                                                 Regards  FED


sad faceCrikey Gus,  I am  saddened  by the predicament  you  found yourself  in  mate  and  I  do  understand